The Brit was coerced into travelling with the Moose Herd to a beach at the other side of Tampa Bay to watch the pretty fireworks. So he leapt in his car and followed the Moose Mobile across the bridges to the location by the bay!
Well it was chocka block with trucks and I MEAN CHOCKA BLOODY BLOCK!
I was not able to park directly beside the Moose Mobile because of the gradient and the sand so I took the Brit Car to a car park just down the street!
By the time that I returned the Moose was already knocking back the Mad Dog 20/20
Empty Mad Dog 20/20
and within minutes was staggering around the beach like a sexually frustrated anaemic whale, screaming at the Moose Calf’s with the bellow that only the Moose can do!
Drunken Moose
The Moose Herder was sitting on the coolers at the back of the truck and the Brit sat with him “safer up here than down there to get trampled by the drunken Moose” thought the smart Brit!
The Brit and Moose Herder cracked a couple of cans of ale and eagerly awaited the firework display by a local radio station at the other side of the bay! The countdown began and the fireworks started! But this humble Brit has got to give it up tot eh rednecks on the beach …….. they ROCKED! There were tons of fireworks heading off into the bay by the redneck contingent and this Brit has to applaud them!
The Brit wondered why things had gone so quiet and realised that the Moose had pretty much passed out and the Moose Calf’s where fighting amongst themselves and the Moose Herder was losing control and the sensible Brit though “I’m scooting …….. tarra” and he took off and meandered to his car and took off for the sanctuary of his room in the Moose Barn ……… albeit short time peace and quiet!
It wasn’t long before the Moose Herd arrived back ………. and mayhem ensued as usual.
Pencil boy was fighting with the prego Moose Calf and Pencil Boy’s even tinier and foul mouthed mother was sitting outside with the engine running. Out came Pencil Boy uttering words that would make a docker blush and the Moose yelling and slurring after him as Pencil Boy’s mum screeched away in the ready to fall apart car!
The Brit was viewing this farce, with Coors Light in hand, from the same vantage point as he did for the repossession of the car! ……….. I guess the Brit must have a season ticket for the White Trash Olympics or something!
Ah well …………………… the Brit has just GOT to do something to escape from the Moose Barn ………… they make the Valkyrie from Hell look like sweet furry little characters from Sesame Street!
The Brit and Moose Herder cracked a couple of cans of ale and eagerly awaited the firework display by a local radio station at the other side of the bay! The countdown began and the fireworks started! But this humble Brit has got to give it up tot eh rednecks on the beach …….. they ROCKED! There were tons of fireworks heading off into the bay by the redneck contingent and this Brit has to applaud them!
The Brit wondered why things had gone so quiet and realised that the Moose had pretty much passed out and the Moose Calf’s where fighting amongst themselves and the Moose Herder was losing control and the sensible Brit though “I’m scooting …….. tarra” and he took off and meandered to his car and took off for the sanctuary of his room in the Moose Barn ……… albeit short time peace and quiet!
It wasn’t long before the Moose Herd arrived back ………. and mayhem ensued as usual.
Pencil boy was fighting with the prego Moose Calf and Pencil Boy’s even tinier and foul mouthed mother was sitting outside with the engine running. Out came Pencil Boy uttering words that would make a docker blush and the Moose yelling and slurring after him as Pencil Boy’s mum screeched away in the ready to fall apart car!
The Brit was viewing this farce, with Coors Light in hand, from the same vantage point as he did for the repossession of the car! ……….. I guess the Brit must have a season ticket for the White Trash Olympics or something!
Ah well …………………… the Brit has just GOT to do something to escape from the Moose Barn ………… they make the Valkyrie from Hell look like sweet furry little characters from Sesame Street!
Not the Valkyrie From Hell
And then there was the nightmare!!!!!!!!!
AAAAAAGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHH SCREAM!!!!!!!
Closed captioning for DO REDNECKS ROCK OR WHAT! is brought to you by,
Doreen’s Delectable Dusters
Doreen’s Delectable Dusters
and
Renaud’s Rubbishy Fake Rottwellers
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